Anyone who has ever had the pleasure of doing something and getting positive feedback the first time knows the only thing harder than that is an encore. I was rather surprised yet humbled by the raving reviews from the last Chronicles of a New Bride which was The Plan and I was nervous about doing this again for the simple fact that I don’t know if I could do it. So God and I had a chat and I told him I’m not sure how people would take it if I keep exposing the slightly absurd and mostly crazy state of mind that is me. He then told me that everything He has taught me was not just for my benefit or so that I can turn the crazy down a notch but it was to benefit others as well. So he reminded me about this conversation we had a couple of months ago. Take a walk with me and see…..
One lovely afternoon, I forget the day, God and I were having this very intense conversation about submission and He took me back to my younger days and showed me the misconceived ideas I had of this particular subject. Disclaimer: this was a time in my life when my life was a circus, a roadshow and a clowns convention rolled into one! Anyhow, I had a couple of like-minded girlfriends who were all single just like me and of course we talked a lot about how we would like our husbands to be like. We were quite a riot really, don’t get me wrong we were all church girls and serving faithfully, just horribly misguided. I particularly remember us listing the qualities we wanted and they revolved around him looking like a greek god …..Oh yeah and of course of the faith, …but most especially a greek god!
Now now don’t be judging me and you know you went through that phase. If it was up to us we would clone Boris Kodjoe, slap some Jesus on him and we’d be happily walking, no skipping, down the aisle and vowing forever. Please note the only reference to the content we desired in this mythical creature we had created was that He had to have some Jesus factor and that’s about it. We wanted an authoritative forceful kind of man. Reason for that? Oh we knew only such kind of men would be able to “handle” us and oh the misconception that we could only submit to such kind of power. Aaaah…the folly of youth!
Praise be to God for unanswered prayer, and the church said a resounding AMEN! Now before you think of how shallow and wrong we were, and Lord knows we were, let me take you further back in history. Back in ancient Israel, there was a bunch of folk, who were equally misguided. They expected the great promise of a Messiah, they lived and hoped for that day, and then they rejected Him. Why? He didn’t come in a flamboyant display of power and force, at least not in the carnal sense. They expected Him to swoop in and destroy the Roman Empire and establish His Kingdom! All Hail the King! Instead? He came in the most subtle kind of way, and His display of force and power was not an army and never-seen-before-weaponry, it was love.
This is how God answered my prayers, He gave me a Jesus-like husband instead. The only force he lays claim to is love. See, no one likes to be dominated, and submission to force is domination and slavery. But submission to love? That’s marriage how God intended it to be. He loves me till I can’t help but submit, isn’t that how God intended it to be. I used to say why should women be the ones getting the short end of the stick? but clearly I was looking at it all wrong. God told the man to love you to death. Yo! Let’s do a retake, say what? Yep! Ask Jesus, He loved to death, and our response to that is submission and devotion to Him.
Now you’ll say hey now, no one is about to go on a cross or nothing let’s not get carried away here, but death on a cross is actually death to self. Anyone who is married knows sometimes you push that man so far he gotta be dead to take it! Every time you trifling, he is commanded to love you so much he loves you out of your wrong! (Woooo I feel a preach coming on!) But seriously, let’s detox from the worldly view of submission, that’s the only way we can have healthy marriages. The articles we read that give a distorted view to God’s plan for marriage are the same articles that give statistics on divorce and glorify it. I know I just got here but I’m here to stay, as am sure every bride who walks down the aisle intends. We all want to be the exception to those statistics, we want to ride into the sunset with our beloveds until the end of time. Well, I have it on good ground that the only way for that to happen is if we follow God’s script. And God’s script to submission is very clear. Husbands love, wives submit.
That, my friends, was the conversation we had that random afternoon. So you see in the midst of all the crazy going on up in this pretty head, there’s also some intense conversations going on. But on the real, let’s follow God’s script for submission and see how it makes all the difference of the world.
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